Whilst my better half has been away I have discovered some things.
My husband has much more comfortable pillows than me. Switch made….
His tshirts make the best summer pj’s.
The bathroom stays clean.
I can cook after all.
Before I had children I was super organised, efficient and capable. Then I had children and my brain turned to mush. Whilst husband has been away that former woman has made a welcome appearance. ” Hi.”
I can delete Top Gear from the Sky Box and the Gadget Show and Click…
I can watch Ugly Betty and Ghost Whisperer when I want to, for as long as I want to
I don’t feel guilty for reading a book.
The ironing pile still increases faster then it decreases.
The phone rings more often, girlfriends want to say hello.
I ring girlfriends more often. I want to say hello.
I do the things that I put off and try the things that scare me a little.
I can’t wait to see my hubby again soon, but this week I have found that I actually quite like little ol me and little ol me is a lot, LOT braver and capable than I thought.
Just a quick follow up. I have paid around 87 cents per minute to call Ryanair and guess what. Straight away they tell me on a pre-recorded message that all their operators are busy….how very convenient is that. Meanwhile the 87 cents notches up to another 87 cents before I decide how stupid am I and just hang up. My call probably paid for an Indian call centre operator to have his or her lunch. The pre-recorded message told me to check my bookings online. Well, no I cannot do this for I am blocked out. So am now going to book tickets with another airline, Easyjet. What is the bet that in a few hours I get an email saying that Ryanair have indeed processed my payment after I’ve spent £600 on new tickets with Easyjet? This day is going from bad to worse……
LATEST did finally get onto the booking management page and thank god I did as guess what, they had taken my money. But still no email confirmation. They also told me on their website that there is no charge for retrieving passenger information. Well Ryanair I am so very grateful. Now I have to check in online and print off by boarding passes otherwise we get a 40 euro/pound charge. What’s the bet that there will be a problem with printing off the passes and it takes another call to a pre-recorded message charging me 87 cents per minute?
Seriously worried now that we’ll take off and there will be a pre-recorded message from the non existant pilot, that the air stewards will be part time lap dancers and that we may be re-directed to Afghanistan and then charged for the diversion back home.
I have to fly out with the children next week for a funeral and I’ve gone through the whole booking tickets process with Ryanair to fly out from London to Malaga. I have given them my credit card information and the whole payment process was going through. Until it stopped and said ERROR and that their website was having problems. Terrific timing Ryanair. I have no idea at this point if I have booked tickets or not so I think, I’ll send them an email. Ah, no. Ryanair has no email contact, no email for customer services, you have to pay £1.00 for the call, or was that a minute. This was my first time booking with the airline that says we may have to pay to go to the loo, we may take standing passengers and I am urgently trying to organise flights and now I am stuck. I wish I had just paid the extra £100 that it would have cost to have flown with Easyjet as their website is an absolute breeze to use.
Ryanair, change your servers, change your technical support staff and guess what…I’m changing airline.
Still trying to find out if my credit card payment has been taken….and still receiving this message.
Error – Your session has been locked
We are experiencing some difficulties with the website. Please wait 10 seconds and if you are not redirected back click here. ( this doesn’t work…)
If you have already submitted payment your new reservation or flight change MAY have been confirmed. ( no it hasn’t)
Before starting again please firstly check your email account to see if you have received an email travel itinerary or alternatively you can check to see if your transaction processed by going to Manage Booking section of our website and completing the information required in Option 3. ( The manage booking section, yawn, doesn’t work)
I have not been redirected and their link does not work. The Manage Booking page does not work. I haven’t received an email, and I have just possibly or possibly not spent £511.00. Just wondering if their aeroplanes work? Do I risk buying a ticket with another airline or do I do what would be so very convenient for Ryanair, spend a few pounds at their telephone call centre? The word scam comes to mind.
Just in case there are any robbers about, let me tell you tonight I am armed, loaded and dangerous. I have weapons of mass destruction – hypo allergic pillows, trip wire and cockroach spray. I can also scream so loudly that I can make upvc windows shatter and I think I may have swine flu. You’ve been warned.
I’ve had a really bad night and I mean REALLY bad….I nearly started tapping away here at 4.33am, but I thought the robbers and masked men in the house might hear me.
My husband had to leave for the UK last night, very last minute as he needs to sort out arrangements for a funeral. Everything was ok here until just after midnight. The children were asleep, I went to bed and then I realised that it was just me in charge of my children. If anything happened, I was boss. Usually if there is anything suspicious my husband gets up and takes charge, he’s a lot bigger than me and looks more moody. Last night I began to realise that if a robber did come into the house then I wasn’t really prepared. I checked my nearest weapon which was a pillow. I’m pretty good at pillow fights and I’m convinced that I am a black belt karate expert even though I’ve never had a lesson beacuse I have seen a few Lara Croft films. Every noise became a potential threat and I have clearly been overdosing on my serial killer books as I just could not get to sleep for thinking that there were not just one, but several serial killers in the house after my family. At one point a sinister Morrocan man was gasing my children to send them into a coma. Only it wasn’t, it was one of the children spraying a mosquito above their bed with fly spray. Then I heard a scary Spanish man clambering over our balcony wall, clearly he had broken into next door and was now about to come into our bedroom. Only it was just some leaves blowing about on the terrace. I heard Jack the Rippers relative creeping outside and knocking a cat bowl over. I heard it smash so he must have been huge and clumsy. I may have a chance armed with a pillow, but it was just a stray cat near the front door. Unless it was not a cat but a werewolf…..Clearly I needed help and not just a psychiatrist. So I decided to create a silent, panic room. I closed all the windows, closed all the doors and turned on the air conditioning as I was now very hot, sweaty and clearly delusional. The sound of the air con meant I coudn’t hear very much else. Finally I began to settle, curled over to my husband’s side of the bed and began to think about him. It was now around 5am and he had promised that when he landed at Gatwick he would ring me. I was worried as he had a 2 hour drive ahead of him when he landed, heading towards a stressful situation and his arrival time would have been around 2am. I hadn’t received a call or text. So now I was wondering if he had fallen asleep at the wheel and had been squidged by a Coca Cola lorry. I also began to wonder if Funeral Directors ever offer buy one get one free funerals, or 2 for 1 offers? I may need to take them up on it if they do.
So bleary eyed and worse for wear, but very glad to be alive. Lord knows what demons I’ll face tonight….I had thought that I’d try camping one day, but after last night, can you imagine what I’d be like? I would be seeing men with scissors slicing through my tent, monsters coming up from under the ground. I really should write a book one day and put my vivid imagination to some constructive use.
I was kindly told today that the way to cure the itch from mosquito bites is to lick them with your own saliva. Yes, I’m told to lick and spit…..
In an attempt to reach my itchy elbows I have taken up the rather complicated yogic position called the Compass Pose. Since I have never done yoga this is quite an achievement, I am however now stuck in a knot and am typing with my big toe. This does not have any mosquito bites, but I wouldn’t mind David Beckham or Tom Cruise having a little lick if they fancied it…..
Found this out recently about frogs, “Frogs shed the outer layer of their skin many times a year. Using their forelegs, they pull the old skin off over their head. They then usually eat the old skin”
I think there are few elderly ladies in Marbella that do this too.
OK I’m going to have a rant now.
I am sitting in a dark room watching over my youngest child as she has sunstroke. She went to a friends house today, her mum is over from the UK and although she had factor 30 on, she was out in the sun and pool all day…and I mean all day. Her skin is burnt to bits, she is dizzy, feels sick and has been crying. All becasue she has had way too much sun. This happens everytime we have friends over from the UK. They want to be out in the sun all day, every day and that includes their children.I’m really careful as my youngest is as white as anything, blonde hair, she has completely the wrong set of genes for summer sunshine. Husband is absolutely furious and I suspect the other child’s mother who I collected today who was also burned to bits is also furious. I had assumed that nobody in their right mind would put a child in a pool for hours upon hours, even with re -applying some sunscreen. It isn’t sunblock. It isn’t shade and it isn’t kind.
Don’t do this to children. The sun is incredibly strong and no amount of suntan lotion is going to keep skin from burning if you spend hours upon hours in the pool or beach. Burn youself, go right ahead but DO NOT DO IT to children.
Praying my little girl sleeps through now……poor baby.
Noticed a couple of new shops today whilst shopping in La Canada in Marbella. Firstly Terra Sana has reopened but it is now on the ground floor, located near to the florist there. There are lots of seats and tables outside and I swear to God, their carrot cake was calling out my name. On the way to KFC for a megga big heart attack in a bucket fried chicken ( but who cares, I’ll die licking my lips) I noticed a new toy shop there. Thank goodness, La Canada needed a good toy shop. It isn’t anywhere near as large as the toy shop in Fuengirola, the Mirimar Centre but it looked pretty good. Children start making your lists for Santa now…..already done mine, because Santa will need to start saving hard for the things on my list, I’ve developed a liking for carats….and that is no misspelling.
Marks and Spencers sell climate control pants for men. Nasa must clearly have been involved in the manufacturing of these.
I’m going to try them on my head tonight to see if they keep me cool in this Marbella heat.